Unforgettable Encounters

I like to think that I could be friends with just about anyone. Sometimes I'm not so sure.

BigJason and I used to have this really bad habit of stumbling upon persons of unusual nature. I think you'll agree.

Once upon a night, BigJason decided to stop at Wendy's on our way to someplace or other. He ordered a baked potato among other things. After paying for his food and advancing to the next window an employee of Wendy's described an unanticipated occurrence to BigJason. "Um, we're out of baked potatoes, so..." We waited patiently for him to finish his thought. He didn't. Instead he merely looked at us. This continued for an uncomfortable duration of time. Encouragingly, BigJason replied "So...." Astonishingly, the employee repeated himself, perhaps unsure that we had heard his first unfinished statement. Another uncomfortable silence followed before BigJason, realizing we were about to get nowhere with this guy, said "So, what? So you'll give me my money back?" The employee then explained that they couldn't do that. What happened next, BigJason? Somehow he wound up giving us fries or something instead
of the BP, but we had to perform the duties of customer service ourselves until an agreement could be reached cause this guy wasn't helping. He was done. Now granted, fast-food employees can often be found to be of unusual nature so that story isn't as compelling as this next one.

We were browsing the deli at Albertsons Grocery Store looking for some delicious deli meats when an individual I will refer to as Bozo began to walk past us repeatedly. He kept looking at me intently and after a few passes smiled at me knowingly. After a few more passes he said to me, pointing, "There's a drinking fountain right over there." I thanked him for the unnecessary information and tried to continue my browsing of the meats. Bozo then said that it looked as though I could use a drink. I asked him why he would say that and he gestured toward his eyes with a couple of fingers and rolled his eyes around. Then he imitated taking a drag on a joint and pointed at me. I nudged BigJason to draw his attention to the matter and he nodded to indicate he was following the events closely. It was hard for people to ignore what was going on there in the delicatessen. "You're stoned," Bozo said to me. "You should go get a drink." Apparently people who are stoned like to get drinks. I was blissfully naive to this before that day. I told him that I thought HE was stoned. Why else would he be badgering an innocent deli customer? Bozo then said he knew I was stoned cause my eyes were bloodshot (they weren't) and again suggested that I get a drink from the fountain. This guy was alone. He was not some punk teenager with a need to impress his buddies. I could see no reason for this guy to be hounding me. I don't think he was mentally handicapped but he was definitely mentally deficient. After a few more points and gestures to indicate that I smoke dope he tired of his charades and moved to another part of the store, presumably to accuse someone else of something equally unlikely as me being stoned.