I'm the only one

This is a video of Emma eating breakfast. Isn't she adorable? Please focus on the dialog between Haylee and myself. Children are the best!

Spring Break 2008

On our way to Pagosa Springs we were attacked by this gigantic spider. It was a portent.

While in Pagosa, we dwelt in this architecturally ambiguous "house." The kids called it the mushroom.

I found this squirrel stealing bird food. He and I shared a good chuckle.

We shared the pool with the local swim team which meant that we got kicked out at different times each day for different lengths of time. Oh, also we were given a limited number of passes for pool use, which meant that when we got kicked out we couldn't come back later. Hospitality.

I swear there was a plague of geese. This pair had learned to honk some song by Patsy Cline. I can't recall the name of it. Weird!

Pagosa Springs, as everyone knows, is just plain famous for its hot mineral springs. Oh, excuse me - its hot, therapeutic, healing mineral springs. The look on my kids faces is indicative of how much they enjoyed the smell and the anticipation they felt at the prospect of bathing in the springs.

We went to Mesa Verde to view the cliff dwellings there. That's me in the red hat.

To exit the cliff dwelling area we used these wooden ladders.

We were allowed to climb down into this reconstructed kiva. That ladder was seriously about 8 feet tall.

The P (Part 1)

Thank you for calling Cineplex-Odeon/Plitt's Paramount Theater located at 61 East Center in Provo

My first job was in a theater in Provo called The Paramount. We affectionately referred to it as "The P." It was built as a playhouse and was later turned into a movie theater and so it had incredible character. It had a balcony, a stage, dressing rooms, catwalks, a basement, and trap doors. This building was fantastic. My duties included selling and taking tickets, selling concessions, cleaning, and preventing a grubby gypsy child from stealing candy. Paul worked there too, under the nom de plume "Bar." Though he wasn't an "official" employee that, say, "took home a paycheck," Paul worked for the sheer satisfaction of being inside the magnificent structure. And for free popcorn, admittance, and movie posters.

On Thursday nights it was often necessary to change the marquee after closing. We used a very wobbly ladder which was too short and required that another person be at the bottom to hold it steady and which also required the disregard for the strong warning encouraging users to "NEVER STAND ON THE TOP TWO RUNGS." Upstairs, beside the office, was a large room full of big plastic red letters. Most of them were useless having had their hooks broken off years before. Once while I was trying to come up with an ingenious way to spell "Empire of the Sun" (two times, one for each side of the marquee) with the abridged collection of available letters, I came upon a miniature letter-sign that said "IN COLOR" and I promptly incorporated it. The manager failed to see the humor and made me take it down.

I believe that The P truly imbued me with superhuman abilities. For instance, one time I had been talking to the ticket sales person and turned around to walk back to the concessions counter. The ticket salesman threw a broken crayon at my back and that very instant I turned around and in a split second I noticed the projectile coming toward me and grabbed it from the air.

Please, shed a tear with me now in remembrance of that noble structure which has since been torn down and turned into a parking lot.

Tune in next time for part 2 when Paul drinks straight from the soda fountain and I ingest a half pound of melted butter!

Update

Nacho Libre is my favorite movie. What do I know about roller derby? Coconuts do not reside on ocean floors. Sherri is slightly older than me. Ok, I updated.

Six or Seven generally unknown things about me - IN MULTIMEDIA!

1) It bugs me when people use the word "download" improperly. Download means to copy from a remote computer to a local computer. It is not synonymous with "install", "transfer", "copy", "eat", "defecate" or "pounce upon" and those who use it as such stink on toast.

2) Sometimes I say "stink on toast."

3) I'm not a bad singer. Take a listen to this and this as evidence. Furthermore, I've never had a lesson.

4) I do not get headaches. But I have had Scabies. If you think that's gross,

5) I watch porn (if you consider Flight of the Conchords pornographic). Visit this link if you think you have the stomach for it. (Hint: Not porn)

6) This is what I will look like when I am bald.



7) I'm pretty much the best person I know at Photoshop.

I tag Big Jason and Sasha.



You can read the post where I got tagged here.