Spring Break 2008

On our way to Pagosa Springs we were attacked by this gigantic spider. It was a portent.

While in Pagosa, we dwelt in this architecturally ambiguous "house." The kids called it the mushroom.

I found this squirrel stealing bird food. He and I shared a good chuckle.

We shared the pool with the local swim team which meant that we got kicked out at different times each day for different lengths of time. Oh, also we were given a limited number of passes for pool use, which meant that when we got kicked out we couldn't come back later. Hospitality.

I swear there was a plague of geese. This pair had learned to honk some song by Patsy Cline. I can't recall the name of it. Weird!

Pagosa Springs, as everyone knows, is just plain famous for its hot mineral springs. Oh, excuse me - its hot, therapeutic, healing mineral springs. The look on my kids faces is indicative of how much they enjoyed the smell and the anticipation they felt at the prospect of bathing in the springs.

We went to Mesa Verde to view the cliff dwellings there. That's me in the red hat.

To exit the cliff dwelling area we used these wooden ladders.

We were allowed to climb down into this reconstructed kiva. That ladder was seriously about 8 feet tall.

The P (Part 1)

Thank you for calling Cineplex-Odeon/Plitt's Paramount Theater located at 61 East Center in Provo

My first job was in a theater in Provo called The Paramount. We affectionately referred to it as "The P." It was built as a playhouse and was later turned into a movie theater and so it had incredible character. It had a balcony, a stage, dressing rooms, catwalks, a basement, and trap doors. This building was fantastic. My duties included selling and taking tickets, selling concessions, cleaning, and preventing a grubby gypsy child from stealing candy. Paul worked there too, under the nom de plume "Bar." Though he wasn't an "official" employee that, say, "took home a paycheck," Paul worked for the sheer satisfaction of being inside the magnificent structure. And for free popcorn, admittance, and movie posters.

On Thursday nights it was often necessary to change the marquee after closing. We used a very wobbly ladder which was too short and required that another person be at the bottom to hold it steady and which also required the disregard for the strong warning encouraging users to "NEVER STAND ON THE TOP TWO RUNGS." Upstairs, beside the office, was a large room full of big plastic red letters. Most of them were useless having had their hooks broken off years before. Once while I was trying to come up with an ingenious way to spell "Empire of the Sun" (two times, one for each side of the marquee) with the abridged collection of available letters, I came upon a miniature letter-sign that said "IN COLOR" and I promptly incorporated it. The manager failed to see the humor and made me take it down.

I believe that The P truly imbued me with superhuman abilities. For instance, one time I had been talking to the ticket sales person and turned around to walk back to the concessions counter. The ticket salesman threw a broken crayon at my back and that very instant I turned around and in a split second I noticed the projectile coming toward me and grabbed it from the air.

Please, shed a tear with me now in remembrance of that noble structure which has since been torn down and turned into a parking lot.

Tune in next time for part 2 when Paul drinks straight from the soda fountain and I ingest a half pound of melted butter!

Update

Nacho Libre is my favorite movie. What do I know about roller derby? Coconuts do not reside on ocean floors. Sherri is slightly older than me. Ok, I updated.

Six or Seven generally unknown things about me - IN MULTIMEDIA!

1) It bugs me when people use the word "download" improperly. Download means to copy from a remote computer to a local computer. It is not synonymous with "install", "transfer", "copy", "eat", "defecate" or "pounce upon" and those who use it as such stink on toast.

2) Sometimes I say "stink on toast."

3) I'm not a bad singer. Take a listen to this and this as evidence. Furthermore, I've never had a lesson.

4) I do not get headaches. But I have had Scabies. If you think that's gross,

5) I watch porn (if you consider Flight of the Conchords pornographic). Visit this link if you think you have the stomach for it. (Hint: Not porn)

6) This is what I will look like when I am bald.



7) I'm pretty much the best person I know at Photoshop.

I tag Big Jason and Sasha.



You can read the post where I got tagged here.

Movie Night

If you are easily upset by the sight of blood then do not look at any blood while reading this blog entry. Caution: The previous statement. You have been warned.

One day Paul invited me to go see the film The Count of Monte Cristo at the dollar theater. He even offered to pay. Thanks Paul. The End. Except that it isn't. If that were the end then this story would be not dumb and I assure you that this story IS NOT DUMB. This story occurred on a Friday night. Friday nights at the dollar movie theater are circumnavigational in that you have to drive around the parking lot numerous times (if you are a dork-o-matic lazy good for nothing crybaby) in order to find a good parking spot (instead of just parking further away and walking - lamquen! exercise!). Apparently Paul is a dork-o-matic lazy good for nothing crybaby because rather than parking further away he decided to park his car in the parking lot of the rock climbing establishment next door taking special care to disregard the numerous (many) and threatening signs posted at 4 foot intervals stating that cars parked here by movie-going patrons would be towed. I pointed out that he stood a good chance of getting towed if he left his car there, for the signs had not gone unnoticed by myself. He assured me that he had seen the signs and was aware of the risk but felt that it was minor. I tried (honestly, Mandi, I TRIED) to convince him that this was a bad idea and that I certainly didn't mind walking 200 extra yards in order to park in the safety of the somewhere else. Paul would have none of it and proceeded to the ticket booth. This was the opening night of Count of Monte Cristo at the dollar theater and it being a college town, it was not surprising to note that the show had sold out. It was surprising however to hear Paul ask the ticket attendant for two tickets to A Walk to Remember, a heartwarming film starring the appropriately named Mandy Moore which had the only benefit of not being sold out. I thought Paul had lost his mind. I was certainly not interested in spending a lovely evening cuddling with the present company and crying into each other's shoulders. When I asked Paul what the devil was going on he told me to shut it off and walked purposefully toward the ticket taker who told us our film was being shown in theater 3. Paul walked directly and in the opposite direction toward theater 5 where The Count of Monte Cristo was showing and where another theater employee was stationed to check tickets and ensure that no one snuck into the show. Paul gladly showed him his ticket as he walked past him quickly into the theater and as I passed the sentryman I mumbled "I'm with him." Phew! We watched and enjoyed the movie from this point onward until it ended.

Afterward, we walked back to the car to discover that it had been booted. I looked at Paul's face and laughed and laughed until he finally admitted he was so not cool. The tow company employee who had placed the boot on the car approached us. Apparently he had been waiting in his car for us to show up. He explained that he would remove the boot after being paid a certain sum of money which neither Paul nor I had. Paul decided to call Mandi to have her come pick us up, but we didn't even have enough money for change for the pay phone, so Paul wandered around the still populated theater asking people for change. When he had accumulated enough money to place the call Mandi gratefully answered. She agreed to help, but either Paul didn't tell her to bring the checkbook or she didn't know where the checkbook was because we had to go back to Paul's house, get the checkbook and then come back to pay off the hatchet man. Mandi was unhappy about having to drive back to the theater again so I offered to drive back in my car so she could go back to bed (Yes, that's another thing. Mandi had been asleep in bed). As we drove back I tried to convince Paul that he should offer the fella a bribe, tell him he'd write a $40 check to hatchet man himself. Paul thought it would be funny but figured that it would be a bad idea since it is illegal to bribe people. oh. I kept encouraging him and explaining that bribery is not illegal until finally he agreed to give it a try. Paul tried (not very earnestly, in my opinion) to bribe tow-truck Sally, but failed. Thanks for the movie, Paul. Let's do it again soon.